Closing Time.

Like the DC Comics Universe, my blog has been revamped.

For a full archive of the last 12 years worth of writing as well as the latest in comic reviews, Doctor Who discussions and even more to come, please visit http://www.mygeekygeekyways.com

Good news is I have a Disqus account set up on the new site, so you can keep using your LJ ids to log in and make comments.

You can also follow me on Facebook and Twitter.

See you all soon!

Conan Movie - Fast Thoughts.

Based on a quick glance at several reviews, I seem to be alone on this... but I liked this movie.

It's not fine art but if you're going into it expecting that, you're going to be disappointed.

That being said, this movie is not as good as the Ah-nold flick from the 80s. It is far, FAR better.

Seriously. There's more references to the original Robert E. Howard stories in the first minute of the new Conan Movie than in all of the Ah-nold films.

Some purists may complain that Hoeard never said that Conan's mom died in childbirth or that his village was destroyed by outsiders. I say, "Well, he never said they didn't either." If I recall correctly, Howard said precious little about Cimmeria, its' people or Conan's family, save in one letter to a fan where he said he guessed Conan was inspired to leave Cimmeria by his grandfather's stories.

But leaving aside all issues of canon and continuity, the Conan Movie is a ripping yarn and fits the spirit of of Robert E. Howard's writing.

And for those of you who care little about how well the legacy of Robert E. Howard is upheld, there's a lot of cool action scenes where lots of blood is spilled and lots of topless slavegirls! There's plenty of eye-candy for the ladies and gay men, with Jason Monoma showing off everything except the Savage Sword of Conan... so to speak.

Long story short, it is epic, awesome and over-the-top in all the ways that matter in a good action movie. A must see for all gamers and fans of the sword and sorcery genre.

A Noteworthy Quote, Somewhat Related To The Subject of Geek Girls

"They don't want to be spectators. They're courageous and imaginative and adventurous. That's why you like them. They fit into the world you've chosen for yourselves. If you'd wanted a pair of silly, primping maidens who are good for nothing but gossip and needle-point, there are plenty of those around. But I doubt they'd interest you."

--- Senior Ranger Halt, The Emperor of Nihon-Ja by John Flanagan

Okay, he isn't talking about Geek Girls in the scene above. But the sentiment fits, I think.

Ranger's Apprentice is a great series for Young Adults of all ages, by the way. I highly recommend it.

DC Comics News From SDCC: Day Two

High Res Art From Supergirl, Superboy, Action Comics, and Superman Revealed!

New Supergirl costume to end complaints about up-skirt shots by eliminating skirt completely!

High Res Art From First 8 Pages of Johns/Lee Justice League of America Released!

Looks suspiciously like eight pages from unreleased All-Star Batman and Robin issues.

Grant Morrison on the new Superman costume: A 17 year old wouldn’t want to wear a suit his mother knitted

Morrison then notes new costume is better than original design, which featured ripped jeans and $30 T-shirt from American Apparel.

JMS says Superman: Earth One sequel will reveal that Clark Kent cannot have sex.

Much like your average Babylon 5 fanboy.

Mike Johnson says Supergirl is largely about the character figuring out her own origin.

Because the previous stories where she had no idea who she was or what she was doing on Earth were SO well-received...

Grant Morrison: "You can’t pierce Superman’s skin, but you can pierce his heart."

Later adds, Okay, you COULD pierce his nipples with a Kryptonite needle. But that costume was rejected too."

DC Comics News From SDCC: Day One

'Flashpoint' Panel Confirms Event Will Result in DC's Relaunch Continuity.

50,000 DC Comics fans say "Well, duh..."

Sterling Gates adding a "brand new thing" to the Speed Force that he's very proud of.

SPOILER: It's a caramel center.

Wally West to show up in Kid Flash Lost #3 in an unexpected way.

SPOILER: Drunk. And naked.

Gail Simone reassured a fan that Stephanie Brown would not disappear.

SPOILER: Because technically, if you never existed, you can't have ever disappeared.

Regarding Catwoman - Judd Winick stated that in his first interview he said "sexy" about forty-five times, and it wasn't enough -- and that it was a "dirty, dirty book." Winick described her as sexy, dangerous, prone to stealing things and very, very smart.

Starman has stated that Catwoman was doomed to early cancellation about forty-five-hundred times since it was announced Judd Winick would be writing it, and it wasn't enough -- and that Winick's remarks were "very, very repetitive. Repetitive."

Lobdell said he "doesn't do dark," so this is going to be a "fun" book about a bunch of damaged characters, starring Jason Todd, Starfire and Arsenal.

Noted how incredibly easy it is to do a comparatively fun book with these characters, after what was done with them in Countdown, Titans and Cry For Justice.

On Starfire: Lobdell stated that he wants to shift Starfire away from being fully integrated into human society, and show her more alien side.

Reworked costume will help to show off EVERY side of Starfire.

Wonder Woman's costume to now feature 'retractable pants'.

At least until fan outcry suggests they aren't popular, in which case DC Comics will retract the retractable pants.

The Marvel family is on hiatus for the time being, though they will play a role in Grant Morrison's upcoming Multiversity story, in a book with art by Cameron Stewart titled 'Shazam's Thunder'.

Captain Marvel fans rejoice, for this means Judd Winick is not writing Power of Shazam again.

Because they want to return characters to younger incarnations, Arsenal is now too young to have had children, so Lian Harper no longer exists. He will also have two arms and likely won't be known for abusing heroin.

Roy Harper fans confused. Happy that Rise Of Arsenal is no longer in continuity but sad that all the good stories with Roy Harper are gone too.

Mystery woman on Justice League International cover identified as Lady Godiva.

Disappointed Donna Troy and Gypsy fans mourn. Everyone else asks, "Who the @#$% is Lady Godiva?"

Oliver Queen's new company, Q-Corps, will be “Apple-esque”, says writer J.T. Krul

We hope they mean Apple-esque in that they sell lots of cutting-edge technology to the masses and not because they make substantial financial contributions to anti-gay hate groups.

Dan Didio Says No Big Events For DC in 2012.

Joe Quesada expected to announce No Big Events for Marvel in 2012 by weekend's end.

The (not so) Amazing Spider-Man Trailer and Why This Movie Will Suck.

Is it just me, or does this movie look really depressing?

Now, I know what you're thinking - isn't Peter Parker sort of a depressing character, defined by tragedy? After all, let's consider his past. His parents were killed, leaving him to be raised by his elderly aunt and uncle. He's directly responsible, through inaction, for the death of his beloved Uncle Ben. He's indirectly responsible, through association, for the deaths and injuries of at least a dozen loved ones because his vigilante lifestyle has put so many people in danger.

The answer is yes - Peter Parker is defined by tragedy. But - and this is the important thing - he should not be consumed by it. Because at his core, Peter is someone who refuses to let the bad things beat him down or make him stop trying to make things better.

I don't see any sign of that in this trailer. All I see is lots of angst and emo behavior on the part of Peter. There's none of the sense of fun that Spider-Man should convey, particularly in the lifeless CGI swinging scenes.

So yeah... despite my love of Spider-Man and Emma Stone being far easier on my eyes than Kirsten Dunst, I don't think I'll be lifting my ban on all things Marvel to see this one.

Why Question Geek Girl Cred?

EDITOR'S NOTE: The following was left in our mailbox, written on a mole-skin notebook wrapped in plain brown paper. There were no stamps on the package, nor was an address written anywhere on it. It is published without comment, though an examination of the supplemental materials has led us to conclude that if this is a forgery, it is a damn good one.


Journal. Final Entry. 6.23.11

I write this knowing full well that it may be the last thing I ever write. And yet, the truth must come out. Questions have been asked. Answers have been sought. And still the truth must come out.

It all began months ago, but the battle is as old as humanity itself. It all began when a kerfuffle arose over the idea that certain kinds of women cannot be proper geeks. Or that no woman at all may lay claim to the title of geek This train of thought went on to state that any attractive, well-spoken woman who claimed to be a geek was “faking it” for some commercial purpose.

The truth, as always, is far more sinister. Like the true purpose of aglets.

I began seeking answers earlier in the week after the oldest battle began again. There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth regarding how the newly crowned Miss USA referred to herself as a history geek and spoke of her alleged love of studying history and the Game Of Thrones book series. Unlikely? Most would say yes. Conventional wisdom dictates that beauty pageants and modern fantasy literature go together like bikini models and doctoral studies. Yet the world of geeks is hardly conventional or wise...

Days passed. Trail continued as I read the response to the scandal. One of the geek-girls - the so-called Nerdy Bird Jill Pantozzi – asked several questions of her own...

“Why not take a person at face value until you have serious reason to think otherwise? Why does being a beauty pageant contestant mean you can't also like Star Wars (which Campanella also mentioned at another point in the competition)? What is at the base of this denial of identity?”

Ultimately all these questions came down to one question: who profits? How does a woman ultimately profit from pretending to be a geek?

I studied the Hot Women Pandering To Nerds video for hours yet gleaned few answers. Surely geek males are a minority, not worth pandering to? How does it profit Rosario Dawson to speak a few sentences of Klingon? How does it benefit Megan Fox to pretend that she reads comics and likes drawing? Will pretending to like Star Wars help Jamie Alexander to find acting work?

The most frequent answer when one questions the existence of geek girls is that most of them are ugly and desperate. So great is their desire for the affections of a man that they will weather any indignity - commit any act – all to win the smallest smidgeon of male approval. And while many of these “hot” geek girls may be filled to the brim with daddy issues… still one wonders how it benefits them to pursue the approval of those who are – traditionally – the least desirable companions.

And yet, are geek males really that undesirable to a calculating female mind? Today geek males rule much of the world. A small cabal of computer geeks control our technology. Many of the nerds who played games of power in the Student Council grew to become political leaders. And many of the creative powers in Hollywood are geeks. Such men, while physically diminutive, could be stable providers and would likely be happy for any female attention. Still, powerful though they are, their numbers are small.

Additionally, the rich and powerful would easily have the means to make their secret shames accepted - place comic books on the racks of every news stand in the nation and finance Dungeons and Dragons tournaments in place of football in every high school. So subtle seduction with silky slatterns cloaked and costumed as that most mythical of maidens - the gorgeous geek girl? Improbable. Too much work for too little gain.

After much serious study, it would prove to be a joke that led me to the answer. Ironic.

It was a comment repeated by many a geek girl over the last day – apparently a mocking reference to an early story which likened geek girls to unicorns in that they did not exist. Several opined that there were other, more powerful mythical creatures that they would rather be.

Geek Girls as creatures of myth? Thesis. The pieces were beginning to come together.

The final piece came with a fiery editorial by one Devin Faraci, whose mocking words not only called into question the geek credentials of Miss USA but the very validity of the geek girl blogsophere! Within hours, that very same blogosphere was torn between those who wishes to see him raked over the coals and those who thought that he had a point, tactless though he was in presenting it.

It was then that the pattern hit me.

Every time it looked like the geek girl community was making progress in stopping the pointless sniping over what constitutes a geek and who is or isn’t a shill for a corporate master, some mainstream media blogger would emerge to raise the scandal anew or urge the geek girls into a frothing blood lust against one another. Like clockwork. As if a whole society of men were watching over the geek girl population... as if waiting for something…

After several days of investigation, I had found the truth in a book belonging to a group known only as The Codicil. The geek girls ARE creatures of myth. But they are not unicorns. Or dragons. Or nymphs. They are Immortals. Immortals born at random, blessed with the gift of long life and magical skill and yet cursed at the same time. For The Codicil’s text – which I was able to glance through for just a few moments before being discovered – talks of a time of turmoil which is fast approaching.

Indeed, I fear it has already begun.

Consider once more the conventional wisdom – that no attractive woman would ever be considered a geek or identify herself as such. Yet in the past five years the number of attractive geek girls in the public eye has risen sharply. The Codicil text notes this and explains that while each geek girl is blessed with long life, she may still die if another of her kind severs her head from her neck. And for each of her kind that she vanquishes, the victor geek girl absorbs the knowledge, youth and beauty of her fallen sister. Thus each geek girl is forced to fight eternally against her own kind - conflict after conflict - until only one of them is left.

Such is the way it has always been and such, so The Codicil believe, must it always be.

What we saw when Miss USA outed herself as a geek was a calling out to others of her kind. A subconscious signal - for most geek girls are ignorant of the truth or the power they wield and The Codicil prefer to keep it that way - that the final battle... the time of The Gathering... is about to begin.

The Codicil text is conflicted upon when and where The Gathering will take place. Some say it will happen in San Diego. Others say it will happen in Atlanta at the place of The Great Dragon. Regardless, all agree that The Gathering shall be a great and bloody display and that many innocents will die along with the Immortals.

Of course these battles have been going on in the shadows for years. It is a matter of record that Gail Simone claimed the head of Devin Grayson several years ago, thus cementing her position as Queen of DC Comics. And even now rumors have spoken of heated battles between Olivia Munn and Blair Butler on the rooftops of Los Angeles…

I post this now, knowing that The Codicil – who desire secrecy above all else – will likely kill me for having exposed them and their plans to continue to reduce the numbers of geek girls by encouraging them to turn against one another.

Know this – if I die, I die content, secure in the hope that this knowledge might encourage peace between the geek girls that still remain.

I hope to prevent a dark future where Action Chick Katrina Hill and Jessica Mills die on one another’s blades in the aisles at ComicCon. I hope that Felicia Day and Kristen Bell can throw aside their weapons and exchange hugs, not deathblows. But above all else, I hope for a world where the most outrageous nonsense regarding this issue is written by comic book parodists and not serious journalists.

The Answer

Green Lantern The Movie: A Review

To sum the movie up in one word, disappointing.

With all of the talent involved this should have been a home-run. Instead they took one of the most basic superhero origin stories there is and managed to make it more complicated even while dumbing it down.

Suffice it to say, if you're a Green Lantern purist, you'll likely be pissed off by the liberties taken. Even more liberal fanboys like me, who understand that sometimes these changes have to be made, will wonder exactly WHY certain changes were made when the changes don't make much more sense than what was in the original books.

Still, the movie has much to recommend it. The biggest problem is that the excellent cast is poorly utilized with nobody getting much in the way of screen time or development, except for Hal who is earnestly played by Ryan Reynolds, though the script - penned by four actors - leaves Hal Jordan seeming more schizophrenic than conflicted.

And yet - despite all this - I liked it. I didn't love it. And it's nowhere near as good as I'd hoped. But I'd say it's worth seeing on the big screen because the effects ARE amazing. The movie isn't anywhere as bad as it's being made out to be by some critics but I can't really say it's that great. It's a popcorn movie. Nothing more.

For massive spoilers, read behind the cut.

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